A crack, a split, a tear in the seam
A scab you can’t leave alone.
Locked in, caged, tied down,
A bird, trapped, that had once flown.
Wishing I could switch it off,
Disable the plug of power.
Instead the climb to peace of mind,
Feels like an infinite tower.
I grab and scratch at my tired skin,
Unable to resist, I succumb
The physicality I once felt,
No feeling here now, just numb.
The focus of my saturated mind,
Same thoughts over and over, repeat.
I struggle to calm, rest and sleep,
Talk, focus, function and eat.
Craving blackout, stop the sound,
Silence, quiet, I beg you please.
A moment, a second, respite
Then returning with vengeance to tease.
My screams make no sound
Just my heartbeat, my drum deep
Tomorrow could be the day it changes,
For now, sleep, sleep, sleep.